The Right Direction …

“I’ve lived through many challenges and have done several jobs. But after the death of my dear one, my life came to a standstill. I want to start the ball rolling again. How do I find a direction in life?” - I was in discussion with one of my very close acquaintance. It reminded me of a quote ; 

“Traveler, there is no path. Paths are made by walking.” — Antonio Machado. Wonderful ! 

Meaning, A possibility was born the day you were born. 

We are exciting possibilities. Possibility means potential, but it also denotes uncertainty. That makes some people uncomfortable. They want to know their purpose in life with absolute certainty. But the truth is life is like a kaleidoscope. That is, it is a beautiful, ever-changing pattern. We cannot predict what it will look like from one moment to the next. Like each rotation of the kaleidoscope and each step we take leads to a delightful surprise.

If you cannot find your path or direction, it’s simply because path of life is created, not found.  If you feel you are going nowhere, please understand that NO-WHERE is NOW-HERE. Live in the moment. Let the moment (NOW) tickle you with delight. Do what needs to be done NOW, and all your NOWs strung together will form your path. 

When we think about our path or direction, we usually think about our job. Understand,  we are not defined by our jobs, but by our principles. You see, it doesn’t matter if you are an engineer, entrepreneur, artist, journalist, bus driver, or plumber. What matters is what kind of engineer, entrepreneur, artist, journalist, bus driver,  or plumber you are. That is, are you kindhearted, helpful, understanding, accepting, or honest? Your path, then, is not a particular occupation, but a set of principles you dedicate your life to. Once you have established these principles, you can take any job. A job is nothing more than an avenue to bring your principles to life. In other words, any job is the right job when your thoughts, feelings, and actions are right.

The reason many people are lost or unhappy is because they are trying to decide what job & pay-off to take instead of what principles to live by. Remember, happiness, success, and fulfillment don’t come from your job, but from adhering to your principles.

The best path through life is the highway. HIGH way means the NOBLE way, the RIGHT way. Your life direction should be to move your life in the RIGHT direction. When you do that, everything else takes care of itself. As long as your head and heart go in the right direction, you won’t have to worry about your feet. After all, how can you get lost on a path that is straight simple ! 

May the path you follow light up your life and the lives of everyone you meet

Attitude in the cycle of life …

Life is about constant, predictable patterns of change. As the wheel of life continues its constant turning, all human emotions appear, disappear, and appear once again. 

A major challenge faced by us all is that we must learn to experience the changing of life’s cycles without being changed by them; to make a constant and conscious effort to improve ourselves in the face of changing circumstances. 

If you carefully think, you will understand the importance of developing the belief on power and value of attitude. It is our natural destiny to grow, to succeed, to prosper, and to find happiness while we are here. 

By our attitude, we decide to read, or not to read. By our attitude, we decide to try or give up. By our attitude, we blame ourselves for our failure, or we blame others. Our attitude determines whether we tell the truth or lie, act or reject, advance or recede, and by our own attitude we and we alone actually decide whether to succeed or fail. 

How incredibly unique that a God who would create the complex and immense universe would create the human race and give to those humans the free choice that would permit them to select their own achievement or their own destruction. 

This strange, but all-knowing God gave to us a delicately balanced sphere called earth. On it, he placed the intelligent human who would either develop it or destroy it. How terribly fascinating that a God would leave both projects - earth as well as humans - unfinished! Across the rivers and streams he built no bridges; he left the pictures unpainted, the songs unsung, the books unwritten, and space unexplored. For the accomplishment of those things, God created the unfinished human who, within his heart and mind, had the capacity to do all these things and more, depending upon his own choice. 

Attitude determines choice, and choice determines results. All that we are, and all that we can become has indeed been left unto us. For as long as you continue to draw breath, you have the chance to complete the work in and for the earth and for yourself that God has begun for you. In the cycles and seasons of life, attitude is everything ! 

The Captain Of The Ship

I recently read an interesting article on ‘The Captain Of The Ship’. I was impressed with the way author conveyed the attributes of successful captain. 

“Do you steer by the light of the stars or the lights of each passing ship? 

How good a seafarer are you? Are you the captain of your destiny or is your ship adrift in the sea of life? Have you carefully charted your course or are you aimlessly following others? No wind can help the ship that is bound for nowhere. And at the end of your voyage, you won’t be asked about the storms you encountered, but whether or not you reached your destination. If you’re unclear about where your ship is heading, don’t panic; there’s still time to refer to the map in the Captain’s Quarters (your mind). To navigate your way, you will need the help of your shipmates: acceptance, accountability, aspiration, attitude, aim, action, and achievement.” 

There’s no point in blaming our circumstances or others for our lack of success because blame doesn’t advance us. We cannot control others or events; we can only control our own thoughts and actions. So it is time to assume ACCOUNTABILITY, to take responsibility for our own success. You are the person who has to decide — Whether you’ll lead or will linger behind. Whether you’ll try for the goal that’s afar or just be contented to stay where you are. 

Aspiration and attitude

Archie Danielson has put it perfectly - “Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings.” 

ASPIRATION, or ambition, is the desire to improve your life. Aspiration is like taking a deep breath and optimistically jumping into the adventure of life. Aspiration stokes the fire of enthusiasm. When you want to succeed, you get excited about preparing for success. Acceptance, accountability, aspiration, enthusiasm, and optimism fuse to form the ATTITUDE of success. 

Aim, action, achievement.

Maxwell Maltz wrote, “People who say that life is not worthwhile are really saying that they themselves have no personal goals which are worthwhile. Get yourself a goal worth working for. Better still, get yourself a project. Always have something ahead of you to ‘look forward to’ — to work for and hope for.” Now that you are fired up to embark on your journey to success, you are ready to set your AIM.  

 Once you have set your goal, it is time to break it into small tasks that you can easily do and schedule. These tasks, or ACTION steps are your keys to success, your road map to your goal. 

Finally, as you work on your plan for success, continually monitor your progress, analyze your obstacles, and adjust your plan so even if you change your route, you will remain on target. The result ? ACHIEVEMENT, or accomplishment ! 

People may doubt what you say, but they will believe what you do, so let’s start planning our new life today. Look out world, here ‘I’ come !

Leaders Are Effective Communicator !

“I know my engineering degree alone doesn’t guarantee success. What do you think is the most important quality for someone who wants to become a business leader?” someone asked last week.

I answered without hesitation: The ability to communicate. Individuals who communicate effectively with people at all levels, of both genders, and from a variety of cultures and backgrounds are today’s pace-setters. In the old-style hierarchical, authoritarian setting, communication is relatively simple. The top person tells the underlings to jump, and the underlings need only ask, “How high?”

In a modern organization, communication requires more finesse. The leader is not a transmitter of commands but a creator of motivational environments. The workers are not robots responding to switches and levers, but thinking individuals pouring their ingenuity into the corporate purpose. The corporate ideal is not mechanical stability, but dynamic, innovative, continuous change.

The leader who can’t communicate can’t create the conditions that motivate. The genius who can’t communicate is intellectually impotent. The organization that can’t communicate can’t change, and the corporation that can’t change is dead. The good news is that anyone can become an effective communicator :

# Desire.

Human infants have an inborn desire to communicate, and that desire enables them to pick up words quickly and to enlarge their vocabularies continuously.

That same kind of desire can enable you to enlarge your stock of words and improve your skill in employing them.

# Understanding the Process.

Language is the primary conveyer of thoughts and ideas. It turns abstract concepts into words that symbolize those thoughts. Those words take the form of spoken sounds or written symbols. If I say “I want a writing instrument” my listener only gets a general idea of what I want. If I say “I want a golden ‘CROSS’ pen to add style to my signature” the listener has a more vivid mental picture. The more skillful you become at conveying images, the more effective your communication will be.

#  Master the basic skills.

Some people think the first requisite for good communication is an exhaustive vocabulary and needs a heavy dose of grammar. Words are important. Good grammar is important. But the most important rule of communication: Make it clear and understandable. The vocabulary you use in every-day speech are the words that you understand. Chances are, they’re the words your friends, colleagues and employees understand. If you try to use words beyond the vocabularies of the people you’re trying to communicate with, you’re not communicating; you’re showing off. The communications that endure are written in plain, simple language.

#  Practice.

I remember a story that gave me inspiration. A young musician had listened with wonder as a Piano master poured all his love and all his skill into a complex selection of great compositions. “It must be great to have all the practicing behind you and be able to sit down and play like that,” he said.

Oh,” said the master musician, “I still practice eight hours every day.”

“But why?” asked the astounded young man. “You’re already so good!”

“I want to become superb,” replied the older man.

Most of the people are content to become good. Few are willing to invest the extra effort to become superb. To become superb, you have to practice. The techniques of communication have to become part of your daily activity, so that they are as natural to you as swimming is to a duck. The more you practice these techniques, the easier you’ll find it to connect with people, whether you’re dealing with individuals one-on-one or with a group of thousands.

Always remember: Whatever communication task you undertake, your objective is to connect with people.

The Best and The Worst …

Few days back I read a story in ‘Panchatantra’. We all have read this when we’re kids. Read it now, to understand it’s easy to practice not so difficult solutions. 

” There was once a king who had two court jesters in his court, –one who always smiled, one who always frowned. 

To the smiling jester the king ordered, that he discover, the best thing in  his kingdom. To the sad jester he asked him to find the worst thing in his kingdom. 

They went out, going from place to place, asking questions and searching.  They returned to the king with the news he asked for. 

The smiling one said “The best thing is the human tongue. With it people would praise me and encourage me and lift me up. Yes, the very best”. 

The sad one scowled a bit and said “What are you talking about? The worst  thing is the human tongue. People cursed me and said terrible things to me and made me feel worthless.” 

How can it be ? The same tongue ? And maybe there’s a message in who got the praise and who got the condemnation. 

Moral of the story : Everyone makes a choice of their opinion on what they see, understand and experience about you. 

Non-Situational Integrity !

Today many companies talk about ‘corporate social responsibility & business ethics’, it has become fashion and a ‘buzz word’.  In my opinion, if it starts with an individual, then only it can be implemented at corporate level. 

Integrity is a standard of  personal morality and ethics, is not relative to the situation you happen to find yourself in and doesn’t sell out to convenience. Sadly, most people continue to be taken in by big talks, fake projections of popularity, flashy or bizarre looks, and expensive possessions. They move through most of their life convinced that - the externals are what count, and are thus doomed to live shallow lives. Men and women who rely on their looks or status to feel good about themselves inevitably do everything they can to enhance the impression they make – and do correspondingly little to develop their inner value and personal growth. The paradox is that the people who try hardest to impress are often the least impressive. Puffing to appear powerful is an attempt to hide insecurity. 

Integrity that strengthens an inner value system is the real human bottom line. Commitment to a life of integrity in every situation demonstrates that your word is more valuable than a surety bond. It means you don’t base your decisions on being politically correct. You do what’s right, not fashionable. You know that truth is absolute, not a device for manipulating others. And you win in the long run, when the stakes are highest. 

I quote from a book ‘Commandment for Leadership’ - “You shall conduct yourself in such a manner as to set an example worthy of imitation by your children and subordinates.” In simpler terms, if they shouldn’t be doing it, neither should you. It’s very important for leaders to understand that - ‘what you are’ speaks louder than ‘what you say’.” It is even more true that if what you are matches what you say, your life will speak forcefully indeed. 

It’s hardly a secret that learning ethical standards begins at home. A child’s first inkling of a sense of right and wrong come from every signals received long before he or she reaches the age of rational thought about morality.  Remember, children learn by example - Don’t tell me how to live. Show me by your actions. You’re my role models. 

Change Your World By Changing Yourself !

‘Change’ plays an important role in life. If ‘your’ speed of change is not greater than the rate of change in ‘surroundings’, change will certainly out-perform you. 

There is a famous saying - If You Don’t Change your Mind, Your Mind Will Change You. How true. 

We see most of the people are not generally happy about their state of life, and they keep feeling same way for many years. They don’t realize that if they want things to change, they will first have to change themselves.  At times people don’t try to change because of a false beliefs or those who do try, often give up too soon.  

 Think about why would someone who is unhappy refuse to change? Well, mostly they may not want to give up their misery because it is a tool they use to win sympathy, manipulate others, or play the role of a martyr. So, those who are thinking of change should begin by asking themselves, “Do I really want to change?” 

If ‘desire’ is described as the first step for change, then ‘accepting its responsibility’ could be the second one. For instance – your happiness. The truth is no one except you are responsible for it.. be it your parents, friends, coworkers, neighbors, doctor, government, religion or God. Accepting responsibility means we stop blaming the world for our suffering. 

Sidney Madwed — “Every man is the architect of his own life. He builds it just the way he wants it. However, after he has built what he wants, he sometimes decides that he doesn’t like what he has built and looks for someone or something to blame instead of changing himself.” Perfect !! 

If we are unhappy it is because we are doing something wrong. Nothing will change until we do. That is, we have to change our thoughts, beliefs, and view. The fact is, it is not what happens to us that causes our unhappiness, rather it is our negative interpretation of the events. Until we grasp this point, we will be unable to move forward. To improve we have to be able to say, “It is not what happens to me that causes my suffering, but how I react, fight against, and struggle with what happens.” 

Many people, despite a sincere attempt to change, give up trying to and return to their old ways. The main reason for this is they expect too much too soon. They expect to see changes overnight. And when they don’t, they give up. To avoid making the same mistake, carefully monitor and record your thoughts, feelings, behavior, and results of your actions. Look for changes in intensity, duration, and frequency. 

Together, we can prove that Leo Nikolaevich Tolstoy (1828 ~ 1910) was wrong when he wrote “Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself.” 

Let’s change the world by changing ourselves. 

Win or Loose …

Success lies in creating a balance between planning for the best and preparing for the worst.

There are some people that base everything in their personal and professional lives on a best case scenario. Any minor bump in the road can cause these people to have a fatal crash. On the other hand, there are people who spend so much time planning for the proverbial rainy day that they never enjoy the sunshine.

There is a famous saying -  “People who think that it is never going to rain again are destined to get very wet.”

Whether it’s the career decision, your health, the weather, stock market, or the economic conditions … change is inevitable.

Few days back, I was watching NBA basketball game on ESPN, what gave me the real learning was when the match analysis was presented - One team was heavily favored, and they were way ahead with less than five minutes to go in the game. Their coach called time out and obviously changed their game plan.

When they came back out on the floor, they held the ball and stalled for time trying to run out the clock. Unfortunately for them, this talented team was great at shooting and scoring but was not good at this delay tactic. They turned the ball over to the other team a number of times and lost the game in overtime.

It could be said that they became a victim of their own caution.

As you move ahead, look for ways to both plan for the best and prepare for the worst.

Persistence - makes the difference !

 Last week I was talking to someone about ‘what makes people give up on their path to success ? and how to overcome it ‘?.

 It reminded me a meaningful quote by Og Mandino – a world famous sales guru and author of The Greatest Salesman In The World —  ”I will love the light for it shows me the way, yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.”  Wonderful !!

 The quality he is hinting at is the one that makes the difference – Persistence.

 Persistence is a unique mental strength; a strength that is essential to combat the fierce power of the repeated rejections and numerous other obstacles that sit in waiting and are all part of winning in a fast-moving, ever-changing world. There are hundreds of highly successful men and women who have cut a path for others to follow, while leaving their mark on the scrolls of history… and every one of these great individuals was persistent. In many cases it was the only quality that separated them from everyone else.

 Think about it. If you took a quick mental walk down memory lane and reviewed some of your accomplishments in the past – large and small – you would have to agree that persistence played an important role in your success.  

Repeated rejection and obstacles are part of a daily routine, where Persistence is an expression of the mental strength that is essential in almost every profession. Ultimately persistence becomes a way of life, but that is not where it begins. To develop the mental strength – persistence - you must first want something. You have to WANT something so much that it becomes a heated desire… a passion in your belly. You must fall in love with that idea. Yes, literally fall in love with the idea and magnetize yourself to every part of the idea. At that point, persistence will be virtually automatic.  

 It is generally believed that a lack of persistence is a consequence of a weak willpower. That is not true. A person could have a highly evolved willpower and still lack the persistence required to keep moving forward in life. In more cases than not, if a person lacks persistence, they do not have a goal that is worthy of them, a desirable goal that excites them to their very core.

 Willpower is important in moving a person toward their goal. However, if there is ever a war between the will and the imagination, the imagination will win every time. What that means is: you’re powered by desire and fuelled by the dream you hold. Once you start to use your imagination to help you build a bigger picture of your dream, you can  then define and refine it until you get it just right for you and your success.

To Get.. Learn To Give First !

Nothing teaches character better than generosity.

Giving is better than receiving because giving starts the receiving process. Only by giving are you able to receive more than you already have. Curiously enough, the giving spirit creates the receiving spirit. So, to get more all one needs to do is give more. The more ideas one creates and gives away the more ideas one has.

“I’ll spend the first half of my life creating great wealth and the second half giving it away…Attempting to do the most good and the least harm with my benefactions.” — Andrew Carnegie, the steel baron and philanthropist who funded more than 3,000 libraries all over the world.

In giving and sharing you always have more. It seems arithmetically as though one would have less but, in fact, giving expands whatever one has. Music is the best example of this theory, proving that giving and sharing always creates more for everyone.

When a musician gives their all, they feel exalted and thankful that the music flowed through them. The audience is enthralled, entranced, moved to happy tears, and feels compelled to participate instantaneously in a standing ovation. The star musician bares his soul and the audience experience the ‘wow’ and delighted to tell everyone to see this performer.

Likewise, the simple act of giving simultaneously creates more good and blessings seemingly out of nowhere. Why?

Because God is always watching and cheerfully gives instantaneously to the giver. That’s why givers’ give more. They have experienced this amazing formula, even if they cannot articulate it. They know that it works to theirs and everyone’s benefit. 

It’s best to start the discipline of generosity when the amounts are small. It’s easy to give ten cents out of a dollar; it’s a little harder to give a hundred thousand out of a million. Sharing makes you bigger than you are. The more you pour out, the more life will be able to pour in. What you give becomes an investment that will return to you multiplied at some point in the future.